How Can it Be 2020?!

Hello friends! I can’t believe today is January 6th. This last few months I have felt like the time has gone so fast. The holidays felt like a blur…I think it had something to do with Thanksgiving falling so late and now the kids not starting back to school until today. Here we are in what already feels like the middle of January and I am just getting back into a routine. We arrived home late last night from a few weeks away visiting family and spending time at home in OC. It was a whirlwind. I took a bit of a breather from work and Instagram and well…it was really nice! πŸ˜‰ As much as I love creating content, it was nice to put the devices away and spend some good quality time with nieces and nephews doing things that didn’t necessarily make for pretty feed pictures, but made for awesome memories. 

We spent Christmas in Arizona where we met up with my sister and brother and their cute families, along with aunts and uncles, cousins, grandparents, great grandma and some of our dearest family friends. It was tons of fun.  

This incredible grandma of mine celebrated her 86th birthday by cooking 25 of us a huge meal of prime rib and twice baked potatoes and all the other fixings. She is AMAZING and I love her so much.  

We saw so many of the most beautiful sunsets while we were in Orange County! I will never get tired of those dramatic skies over the ocean!

It was fun to reunite in OC with our dear friends that live in London now. We get together as often as possible, but it’s never long enough! We all haven’t been together in OC for quite some time, and it was fun to be back where we first met when our kiddos were teeny!

We always try to sneak in some bowling on New Year’s…this year we were a couple of days late, but still made it happen! πŸ™‚

I spent the majority of the time in OC working hard on the OC Ranch Remodel. It’s coming along and I can’t wait to share some of the progress with you in a few days. As much as I hate to leave my friends and family, it felt good to get back to SLC and take down all of the Christmas decorations that I knew were waiting for me. I couldn’t wait. They all came down last night. lol! The house feels so bare today and I kind of love it. It feels like a clean slate. 

I know that for the last week or so there have been countdowns and recaps and top tens etc. as everyone has said farewell not only to 2019, but to the past decade, and welcomed the new year with excitement. Can I be honest? This last couple of years have been some of the hardest of my life and this coming year seems like it’s a black cloud hanging over my head.  Almost eighteen years ago I thought having a baby that would graduate in 2020 sounded SO cool…so how is it already time for him to leave the nest? Mamas, I need all the advice I can get on how to get through kids leaving home. I am a stress case!

The next six months are full of some hard changes in our house. There are some big questions looming and decisions to be made too, and I’m just not sure what the right answers are. I’m praying hard and feeling confused and sad, and dreading the struggles that I know are ahead. There are no perfect answers, and each decision will bring it’s own set of struggles. I have really felt like a fragile shell of the person that I am these last 2.5 years, and knowing these hard things lie ahead I feel totally overwhelmed, like I just can’t possibly be strong enough to get through it…but I have faith that it will all work out. The older I get, the more I learn to lean on my Savior and rely on Him to help me get through tough times.  I’m sure that I will look back at this time of my life and see the personal growth that took place, but right now…MAN! It feels completely overwhelming. They say hindsight is 2020 right? So bring it on 2020!

I don’t typically get personal here, it’s much easier to keep things light and surface and fun. But sometimes I feel like I need to let you know there is a real person here behind the posts, so thank you for allowing me to spend a minute chatting about things that aren’t so pretty. We will return to our regularly scheduled programing here shortly, πŸ˜‰ but the new decade might have me returning to more of my blogging roots, with personal family posts every now and then if that’s ok. πŸ˜‰

Have a wonderful Monday!

Tammy

xoxo

4 thoughts on “How Can it Be 2020?!”

  1. I love the personal family posts! Oh Mama, I feel your heart! My oldest are twins and they are graduating from high school this year too. Whenever I think about them moving out, my heart feels like it will break in two. I not only love them, but I like them. I enjoy their company each day and I’m going to miss them so much. I remember when I went away to school, I called my mom every day for 3 weeks and cried. I wanted to be at school, but I missed my family so much. However, after my first trip back home for a break, I remember saying “when I get back home”, meaning BYU, it did feel like home too. Change is hard! I just keep hoping there will be so much good happening, that it will outweigh the sadness. Hugs to you!

    Reply
    • Oh man Jennifer!! Two going at once! I can’t even imagine! I totally remember the exact same thing when I left for BYU. I still talk to my mom everyday for an hour! lol! I’m glad we can commiserate this year as our babies leave the nest! πŸ˜‰ I know he’s excited…and that definitely makes it a little bit easier…but not much! lol! πŸ˜‰

      Reply
  2. You got this! Life, for sure, has so many challenges. You seem to have a strong family unit, good friends and a strong faith – all the building blocks for dealing with the curves on this road of life.

    Reply
    • Thanks so much for the encouragement and good reminder Jane. I know in the long run I’ll look back and realize these things were minor bumps in the road…I just need to change my perspective! πŸ™‚

      Reply

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